The Same
by trapt-tage
Summary: Oneshot. Satoshi thinks about the three powers that could be to blame for everything from his genius to his very existance...Then he thinks about whether or not it matters. To some questions, the answers are never found.


Disclaimer: I don't own DNAngel.

AN: This is the original! It was found! If you read the first posting of this, please tell me which you believe to be better, and what you think now. If you've never seen this before, just tell me what you thought, please?

All definitions were taken from the New Webster's Pocket Reference Dictionary' and 'The American College Dictionary'

* * *

The Same

Why_ me? _

It's a simple question, quite childish as well, but simple none the less. Yet, for as simple as this question is, I can't seem to get an answer. Ever since I was a child, I was always able to come up with an answer to any question asked of me, if not _the_ answer. At this point, my life is more at the 'Complete your Mission' status, than 'Learn what you need to succeed.' I've not only already succeeded, but I've surpassed. So my life is now just a mindless existence, dedicated solely to catching Dark. There is no other point to me, except…as a _host_.

I have something inside of me that on one else can have, that I alone have to deal with. Does that make him my _point in life_?

PURPOSE: _n_. the object for which anything exists or is done, made, used, &c.

See, I _do_ have some questions you know, but they aren't questions that were thrown to me from teachers at school or co-workers on the force, these are the questions I've had since I was a child. Since _before_ Krad came to me. Questions from when I realized I was _alone_. These are questions that had come from when I was a child, not a college student or a police commander, and these are questions that _I_ posed, not my professors.

Was I alone meant to carry on the Hikari line? Was my entire purpose just to elongate the life span of the clan as a whole? Why was _I_ the one that had to carry these burdens alone?

SOLITARY: _a_. Remote; single; the only one or ones; lonely

But that doesn't end my questions. Why me? Why was _I _born a Hikari? If I were not a Hikari, would I have even have came into existence? Was my very soul forged by the Fates only to create a child for the Hikari's? Had my mother never had a son, would I have been cast into the womb of another mother?

Why was _I_ the final child? What would have happened if things had been different? Was it really my 'destiny' as Hiwatari always told me? But isn't destiny just a lie people tell themselves when something they don't like happens and there's nothing they can do about it? Is there even a such thing?

Or was it all up to luck? Was I just the 'lucky' entity the God of gods' hand landed on when he threw a life into the last Hikari? What's the difference? Was I just _lucky_ to be born from a woman with to much magic and a demon in her blood? Or was I _destined _like they all told me I was? And still another question: Was it 'Fate'? Isn't just the same? Where are the lines drawn that separate it all? Why is it all an overlapping blur?

DESTINY: _n_. predetermined course of events; one's lot or fortune; _fate_.

LUCK: _n_. Chance; _fate_; good fortune.

FATE: _n_. Fortune; _destined_ outcome; doom.

So was I _fated_ to hate my life? Was I born solely to not enjoy living? Why was _I_ the one to be damned without bail? Was I just the unlucky sole that was destined _and_ fated to be miserable? Or is it that I'm lucky to still be alive, destined to have a heart of ice, and fated to be miserable?

So you see, I don't question what they tell me now, none of those lessons in school trouble me. But it's what they told me when I was a child that I've never figured out how to grasp.

DOOM: _n_. Judgment; _fate_; one's _destiny_.

…I just want to know what I'm doing here and why I am what I am. I know that asking only brings the same answers time after time…which just spawn more questions…which creates more pain and insecurities…which just makes him laugh….but I just want to know…

_Why me_?


End file.
